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Heavenly Father,

You are in charge of everything that will happen to me today -

the good and the bad,

the happy and the sad,

the positive and the negative.

Please help me to be thankful for everything that will happen to me today. For you have given me no more than I can bear and every opportunity that is placed in front of me.

Amen.

Still a little strange though. I wonder how that many people connected to all those hands fit in that small space.

I may not understand why things happen but as long as I understand who is in charge, I’ll be just fine.

This is one of my favorite songs by Twila Paris and it accurately sums up how I’m feeling at the moment. Just close your eyes and listen. I don’t know the girl singing and I don’t know who Kevin is but it’s the only video of the song I could find.

A church in Concord, NC had their trailer stolen. Problem is this church has no permanent location and everything they owned was in that trailer. Hymnals, Bibles, communion trays, children’s pack and plays, etc. So the church took to the media to get the thief’s attention. Check out the two clips: the first is from a local newscast in North Carolina. The other is from the pastor of the church.

I am at a moment of lingering in my life. Details aren’t important but I’m at the point in my life where I’m waiting for my next step; the new direction; the new challenge.

About four weeks ago I came up with the term “linger” because I got tired of saying I was waiting. Waiting implied patience and anybody that knows me, knows that patience is one fruit of the spirit left out of my fruit salad. Along with bananas. I hate bananas.

So today at church I sit down and as I scan the bulletin, I notice the title of today’s sermon - “Understanding and Accepting God’s Timing.” Wow. Remember that old tween book back in the eighties called “Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret.” Well I felt like I was having my own version called “Are you there Lori? It’s Me, God.”

Here are the three points I picked up from the preacher that spoke to me in a sermon that I could promise was meant just for my ears.

1. God’s timing is based upon His purpose, not our preference.
2. God’s patience is based in love.
3. God’s timing is to be trusted even if it’s never understood.

My prayer for the week is that I practice loving patience as I linger. Because not there yet is an okay place to be.

Well my devotional this morning hit entirely too close to home. It was that kind that made me start to squirm and want to put the book away but that’s when you know you really need to pay attention.

I have made myself CEO of my own life. I’ve put myself in the driver’s seat and think that I have control over my life’s path. And I really don’t. Which is why I’m anxious, impatient, joy-less and peace-less. I can only do my best at where I am at right now. Everything else is out of my hands.

I can’t hand down an executive memo telling everyone this is how it will go. Life doesn’t work like that. And as much as I can feel that something may be right for me or want something very badly, I can’t make it happen.

I’ll admit - that makes me even more anxious. But I’ll survive. And really when I think about it, I don’t want to be CEO of anything. Even in my job right now - I don’t want to be the one with absolute control. I don’t want to be the person that has the final say. I want to be a part of something bigger than I am.

So today I start giving up many things - my wants, my dreams, my insecurities and most importantly my CEO nameplate. There is only one CEO in my life that I want making any executive decisions and I just need to listen more carefully.